In my ten years of coaching men and women on the perils of dating and relationships, the one journey women tell me they never want to go on again is meeting and hanging out with the “needy and clingy” man. Nothing turns women off more than a guy who is really needy.
Now, I can practically hear men’s voices protesting from everywhere, saying “But David, there are a lot of needy women too!” This blog is not about them . . . it’s about YOU.
Below are six signs that you are being needy. Remember you are trying to attract women, not turn them off. So if you suffer from any of these signs of neediness, you need to immediately stop those actions.
1. You called a woman last night and she has not yet called you back, so you either email her or call her again to ask her if she received your message. If you want to push her away, this is one of the best ways to get her to quickly run away from you.
2. You start texting a woman you just began dating five or six times a day. You are over-texting her. You don’t need to be checking in every two hours. That’s a sign of neediness and clingy behavior that turns women off.
3. You agree with everything the woman you’re dating says. Women are not looking for a man who agrees with everything they say. Women want a man who challenges them and from whom they can learn. When a man agrees with everything a woman says, he is telling her that he’ll do ANYTHING to have a relationship (which is another sign of being needy).
4. The woman you’re dating is out for the evening with her friends. She promised to call you when she got home. It’s getting late and you haven’t heard from her. You just can’t resist and you call her cell phone several times until she answers it. This is a sign of being needy and insecure. She’s out with her friends . . . not out with another guy. Let her have some personal space and she’ll respect you more.
5. Don’t be afraid to challenge a woman. If you don’t agree with something a woman says, don’t just sit there and agree with her thinking it’s what she wants. Women are looking for someone who is going to stimulate their mind . . . not bore them. Women are not turned on by men they can completely control.
6. Be the man! Have a plan and stick with it. Women like men who plan out evenings of fun. Don’t always ask a woman what she wants to do. Listen to what she likes when you’re having conversations with her, then come up with a fun plan that you will already know she’ll like. A needy man will do whatever a woman wants. A man of action will create plans for what they will do. Being a man of action will lead her to find you a lot more attractive in the long run.
Women are attracted to men who are confident and real. Women want to feel like you need them . . . but only after you already have your own life, your own ambitions and your own goals.
The moment a man starts getting too clingy, a woman will run for the hills. This is exactly like how you will pull back from a woman who becomes clingy and needy.
If any of the items on this list resonates with you, then I suggest you eliminate that behavior so women will no longer see you as needy.
7 Signs You’re Being Needy
By David Wygant